STXWM Blog

My daughter adores the movie about the little red, yellow, green, blue and purple people that live in a little girl’s mind. You know the one where each person represents a different emotion and they help guide her through adolescence. Well, in the movie, they talk about core memories and how it makes the girl feel when she remembers them. This got me thinking about some of mine.

My earliest core memory is when I was 3 years old, and I was playing in my parents’ bathroom. This memory seems innocent enough, until I realize that I’m holding a cup of baby powder and spinning around the room with it. I’m sure I was pretending to be a certain mermaid and having a grand ole’ time. But the memory doesn’t stop there. I also recall my dad being very upset about the winter wonderland I created in their bathroom. The reason this memory is engrained in me was because that was the first time I recognized that I disappointed my parents. That I, their perfect little girl, had messed up. As a 3-year-old, you can only imagine the shock that came over me. “Wait, what just happened? Daddy’s mad at me? I was just playing. What did I do wrong?”

Unfortunately, this is not the only memory I have of doing something wrong. There’s a few that like to pop up every now and then. But instead of pushing them out of the way, and moving on, I tend to dwell on them. I wasn’t a bad kid. I just made poor decisions sometimes, and I tend to relieve them in my mind so that I won’t make the same mistakes again. Before I knew it, I had created a montage of “Melinda’s Greatest Hits: A Presentation on What Not to Do.”

I know I’m not alone in this. Maybe you’re just like me: striving to be perfect only to continuously fail. But this isn’t just about making my parents proud. It’s also about being a perfect Christian. What does perfect even mean?  For something to be perfect, it must have all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics as good as it is possible to be. That seems easy enough, except for one factor: I’m not perfect! However, I’m not meant to meet all the requirements. Even if I did everything right, there would always be room for improvement.

Romans 3:21-25 “This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, ²³for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, ²⁴ and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

Recipes need all the ingredients to be good or edible. If one little thing is off or missing, it can ruin the whole dish. I’ve been cooking for about 15 years now, and I still haven’t figured out how not to burn rice. I can read the instructions and do everything right, but alas my rice ends up black and crispy. Yuck! Luckily, when dinner is not edible, I can count on the pizza delivery guy. Grace is like an emergency pizza.

Grace is God’s unmerited favor and love freely given to those who do not deserve it, offering salvation and reconciliation with God to all who believe. He demonstrated his grace through the sacrifice of his Son for the forgiveness of all mankind’s sin. Now this doesn’t mean we can burn the chicken knowing our husband will call for a pizza. It doesn’t work that way. It’s about the heart.

David was known as “A Man after God’s Own Heart” (1 Sam. 13-14, Acts 13:22). He would later commit adultery and have that woman’s husband killed in battle (2 Sam. 11-12). But how could a man after God’s own heart have all these sins? Because he wasn’t perfect and God knew that. But he also saw David’s heart break. You see David knew he was in the wrong, and he repented with an honest heart.

Psalm 51:10-12 “Create in me [David] a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.¹¹ Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. ¹² Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” It’s a constant battle to let my guard down and be me; mistakes and all. I always have this need to do and act perfectly. So, when I fall short, I don’t offer myself grace (which is probably why most of my blogs are about grace). But God’s grace has no limits. He doesn’t require perfection. Jesus lived a perfect life so that one day he could pay the price for all sin. This meant that we wouldn’t have to make that sacrifice; he came to save us and, through this act of love, brought freedom.

If I could go into that core memory, I would hug that scared little 3-year-old and tell her that no matter what she does, her parents will always love her. Just like God forgave David, He forgives us. We don’t have to live in our mistakes. We don’t even have to be defined by them. We’re all going to stumble and want a redo or a different outcome and that’s okay. God continued to use David, even after his setback. He eventually became a direct ancestor of Jesus.

Today, dare to be imperfect. May you see your mistakes not as failures but as an opportunity to lean into Christ. Your freedom isn’t found in perfection but through his grace. Know that you are loved not because of your perfection (or lack of) but because you trust in the one who is perfect.

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.